Sunday, 9 June 2013

The Time Between The Times

The last few days, even though they have been dreadfully painful, have brought desperately needed healing to my soul and clarity of mind. I feel like my life currently depicts a microcosm of the time between the times. I am in a state of suspension, as it were, knowing that the end of this saga will eventually arrive but not knowing when. Likewise, on a larger scale, I know that one day, there will be no more pain, suffering or death, but I know not when. 

My current affliction has challenged how I live. It has forced me into a state of waiting which, as it happens, I greatly dislike. There is a temptation to wish away this time between the times until it is over so I can get on with my life, but this is a season to be grasped by both hands. Through this season, God is teaching me how to be completely reliant on Him; this is something that I have never been able to do. In this season, nothing is in my control and nothing is for certain. But, when you think about it, it is also very true of life on the outside. The only way I can get through this is to trust that God will look after me each day. By no means does this mean to say that I may take liberties and do nothing. What it means is that, while I am learning to wait, I learn to prayerfully consider my next steps before taking them. This is certainly not my default position; I'm more of an act first think later kinda gal which is fraught with disasters waiting to happen. 

I am still very much a novice at this discipline, but I know now how to live in the time between the times, regardless of the scale. Wait. Pray. Act.
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3 comments:

  1. Anonymous10 June 2013 at 11:32

    Hey Stari, Catching up with your blog now I can access internet in the office, just want to say you are daily in my prayers, and next to my bed is the little envelope that used to have a fig biscuit in it, with Isaiah 54v10 written on the outside - seemed a good time to remember that verse. With much love, Irene xx

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  2. Anonymous10 June 2013 at 15:03

    'Wait. Pray. Act.' :) true

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  3. Liz1 July 2013 at 20:55

    PUSH - pray until something happens
    FROG = forever reliant on God
    WWJD - what would Jesus do?

    You are forever in my prayers - Stari - sometime in your future this blog needs to be a book - it is an amazing true story and so reflective as well as prodding - well it certainly makes me think love Liz

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